Calling All “Super Dad Teammates”!
Do you have a story about supporting breastfeeding and parenting that could encourage other families?
We would love to hear from you!
Email us at info@bfhihka.org.hk
Selected stories will be published on the website of the Baby-Friendly Hospital Initiative Hong Kong Association, helping more families learn from one another and build a more breastfeeding-friendly and family-friendly community.
(This page contains an AI-translated version. In case of discrepancies, please refer to the original Chinese version.)
“She Is the Only One Who Can Give This Gift”
— Snowy and Sheepy’s Dad
Both of our children were breastfed by their mother for over a year. When she first decided to breastfeed, she told me, “In this world, I am the only person who can give this gift to our children.” From that moment on, I fully supported her decision.
I also came to understand that breastfeeding is never solely a mother’s responsibility. It takes support from many aspects of daily life: a comfortable and private environment, adequate rest and sleep, nutritious food, and encouragement from family members. Only then can a mother continue this important and meaningful task with peace of mind.
The challenges of breastfeeding are endless. Is there enough milk? Is the baby getting enough? What should we do about blocked ducts? Breastfeeding can even be painful when a baby bites. Of course, as a father, I can never completely understand the helplessness and uncertainty that mothers may experience during this precious journey. However, I know that as a husband, I can provide both practical and emotional support.
I constantly encourage my wife. Whenever she was exhausted, I would gently pat her on the shoulder and tell her, “You’ve worked so hard.” and “You’re doing a great job.” I tried my best to ease the pressure she faced while breastfeeding. Good communication within the family was also very important. Whenever possible, I took care of things outside the home so that she could have more time to rest and focus on our children.
I also understand the benefits of breastfeeding. Breastmilk provides nutrition that helps strengthen children’s health and immunity and supports their growth and development. Beyond the physical benefits, the unique bond between mother and baby created through breastfeeding is truly irreplaceable throughout a child’s development. For these reasons, no matter how tiring it was, I always felt it was worth it.
In Hong Kong, it is very common for mothers to return to work after giving birth. When my wife resumed work, she also had to ensure that there was enough breastmilk prepared for our children. This was not easy. Keeping expressed breastmilk fresh requires suitable facilities, time, and support in the workplace. None of these preparations are simple. Fortunately, my wife’s employer was able to provide a certain degree of flexibility, which made the journey much easier for our family.
Looking back, there is something I would like to say to my wife: “Thank you for everything you have given our children. I know none of this came easily. Thank you for your patience and understanding. You’ve worked so hard.”
“Just do your best. Your health and happiness matter most.”
— Mr Wong
When I first became a father, I assumed that breastfeeding was mainly a mother’s responsibility. Later, I realised how important my role actually was.
During the early postpartum period, my wife faced the challenges of blocked ducts and the pressure of maintaining her milk supply. Naturally, she felt anxious at times. Besides taking care of household chores, bathing our baby and changing diapers, the most important thing I could do was provide emotional support. I often reminded her: “Just do your best. Your health and happiness matter most.”
Fortunately, my employer offered flexible work-from-home arrangements, allowing me to spend more time with my family during those crucial first few months. Whether it was bringing my wife a glass of warm water or taking over baby care for a while, these small actions helped to ease her burden.
“Taking the initiative to share responsibilities and simply being present is one of the greatest ways a father can support his wife’s breastfeeding journey.”
Our first child was born during the pandemic, and being able to work from home every day gave us precious time and flexibility to care for both my wife during her recovery and our newborn baby.
After welcoming three children, I have come to realise that every baby’s arrival is different, and the way paternity leave is used should also adapt to the family’s needs. With our first child, we were focused on navigating the chaos and challenges of becoming new parents. By the time our second and third children arrived, paternity leave was not only about supporting my wife, but also about helping our older children adjust and ensuring they did not feel left out.
That’s why I believe there is no single “perfect strategy” for paternity leave. The most important thing is to understand what your family needs at that particular time and make good use of the flexibility available through your workplace. Whether leave is taken all at once or spread over different periods, as long as it helps reduce your wife’s stress and allows the whole family to feel supported, it is the right arrangement.
Getting Through the Hardest Days Together
— Seed Dad
Looking back over the past decade, my wife breastfed our three children, completing a breastfeeding journey that spanned ten years. Along the way, our family experienced many challenges, and we came to deeply appreciate the importance of support from fathers, family members, supervisors and colleagues in helping mothers continue breastfeeding.
One of the most difficult periods came when our youngest child was born. Due to health concerns, he had to stay in the neonatal ward for a period of time, and mother and baby were temporarily separated. At that time, my wife had not yet fully recovered physically and was unable to visit the ward regularly to breastfeed directly. Instead, she had to switch from exclusive direct breastfeeding to expressing milk around the clock and sending it to the ward. She worked tirelessly to maintain and increase her milk supply, and the pressure on her was tremendous.
As a husband, I knew I could not take away the physical challenges she was facing, but I wanted to shoulder as much as I could. Besides delivering breastmilk to the ward regularly, I took photos and videos of our baby so that she could see him while expressing milk. I hoped that maintaining that visual and emotional connection would help her relax, encourage milk production, and motivate her to keep going.
Because my wife could not always be with our baby in the ward, I made the most of every visit. I practised skin-to-skin contact, fed the baby, helped with burping, and comforted him whenever possible.
I hoped that our baby could still feel the love, presence and reassurance of both parents.
Even though fathers cannot breastfeed, we can still play an important role during difficult times by participating in caregiving and standing alongside our wives throughout the journey.
Back at home, I took care of our two older daughters, helped with their schoolwork, took them to the playground to burn off energy, handled household chores, and cleaned bottles and breast pump parts. My goal was simple: to allow my wife to focus on resting and maintaining her milk supply.
Whenever she felt physically and emotionally exhausted, I would tell her: “You have already done your very best. You’re under so much pressure, and expressing milk is exhausting. Let me give you a shoulder massage.”
Understanding from Colleagues Gives Strength to Families
Looking back, I remain deeply grateful for the understanding and support of my supervisors and colleagues.
Our baby arrived earlier than expected, but thankfully my team was willing to make flexible arrangements with work schedules and leave, allowing me to spend those critical days supporting my family and caring for our children.
The value of family-friendly workplace policies is not only the leave itself, but also the willingness of colleagues and teams to support one another.
If those arrangements had not been available, my wife would have felt overwhelmed every day, and it would have been extremely difficult for our family to get through that challenging period.
I am sincerely thankful to my supervisors and colleagues for their encouragement, flexibility and understanding, which helped us through one of the most difficult chapters of our lives.
Passing On the Support We Once Received
Today, I have become a team supervisor myself.
Having personally benefited from the support of supervisors and colleagues, I hope to pass that same care on to others.
For colleagues who have recently become parents, I try my best to adjust staffing and work arrangements to help them adapt to this new stage of family life.
For mothers returning to work after childbirth, I understand the importance of breastfeeding and expressing milk. Whenever possible, I arrange suitable duties and schedules so that they can express milk comfortably and with peace of mind.
I am also happy to share my experiences with new fathers. I often tell them that a father’s role is incredibly important. Sometimes a word of encouragement or a little understanding is far more valuable than knowledge or techniques.
If colleagues encounter challenges related to parenting or breastfeeding, I often introduce them to my wife, who can share her own experiences and offer practical breastfeeding support tailored to their individual situations.
I firmly believe that: “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
And I will never forget that I once received support from my own supervisors and colleagues.
“I was blessed by the support of my supervisors and colleagues. Now, I hope to pass on that same love and belief to others.”
How Employers Can Support New Parents
The arrival of a new baby is a major turning point for every family.
Employers can make a tremendous difference by offering understanding and flexibility before and after childbirth. Measures such as flexible use of leave, reasonable adjustments to work arrangements, and a supportive team culture can greatly help new parents.
Sometimes what employees need most is not simply a policy, but the understanding and support of the people around them. That understanding enables them to care for both their family and their work with confidence.
Family-Friendly Measures I Hope to See in Hong Kong Workplaces
I hope to see more family-friendly practices continue to develop in Hong Kong workplaces.
Examples include greater flexibility in work arrangements, family leave that allows parents to accompany their children to Maternal and Child Health Centre appointments and vaccinations, and more comprehensive breastfeeding support facilities and lactation break arrangements.
These measures not only help employees meet their family responsibilities, but also contribute to building a more caring, supportive and cohesive workplace culture for everyone.